Monday, January 30, 2006

Battle with Self

An African saying - "Man’s greatest battles are the ones he fights within himself."

That's what I am doing these days. Fighting a battle with my own black self that stops me from disciplining myself. Though this blog entry is not a treatment to this disease but just a formal realization of what all I am into and how can I come out.

In this huge city, I don't find a single peaceful place where I can purify and pacify my soul. I am getting cooked for the desperation to eat me in the end but not able to save myself.

First time I realize that Discipline is not something one needs to forcefully comply with but to develop a taste for like other things.
Note: Loss of apetite for food is considered a disease because it serves our body's energy needs.

One more thing that I heard from some radio show or magazine is that Organization in any system is must for it to work smoothly. Imagine what would happen if everyday our body parts change places as per their own will!! Similarly, We start failing when we change routines routinely.

Actually over time, I feel I have developed taste for Disorganization. I wanted not to stuck in a machine-like daily routine like other morons but that has made me go on the extreme side of the other end. I don't know whether this disease has struck me or not. Because it's not like I don't like to keep my room organized though it does messes up frequently. The disorganization in my life is more related to my daily activities due to abrupt mood swings.

OK. Let me list some jobs that I want to do routinely.
Keeping mobile for charging
Sleep @ 10.00 pm
Rise @ 6.oo am
Surya Namaskaar - 2 rounds
Siddhasana - 15 mins
Pooja in Padamasana - 10 mins
Get ready before 7.30 am
Limit mail checking to just 4 times a day (9.30 am, 2.00 pm, 5.10 pm, 7.45 pm[if possible])
Blog check days - One weekday, Saturday, Sunday (time spent/ day not more than 30 mins)
Listening music - 40 mins
No headphones in ears while sleeping
Daily Reading - 1 hour (related to general CS topics)
30 mins(related to topic of interest)
Dinner @ 8.30 pm max
Registering my expenses in the diary


Varun said...

Thanks for the heads-up regarding the Hindi translation. Have left a comment on Ashutosh's blog a few minutes ago. Hopefully he will be able to help.

R.Shriram said...

M dear pandit, before posting a blog it is advisable to do a spell check on the contents. (Just use msword crtl c crtl v) After that read it once to your own satisfaction.
I am spreading the word of correctness so thought to suggest you so.
What I have experienced is that discipline and monotony are placed apart very close. Routine but things that interest you will increase the gap and you being in former side.
However if it happens that you suffer from periodic waxing and waning of interests then probably discipline shall wilt to monotony.


Anonymous said...

I feel unhappy after reading your blog that you are not discipline guy and fighting with yourself.....
Please do something about your idetity as you are best......

parwana said...

To anonymous above:
I don't know when you will visit my blog next and read this reply.

Your anonymity has made me too curious and anxious about your identity. But yes after reading ur motivating words, i have got some positivism towards my future.

Thanks a lot.